Wednesday, March 01, 2006

RANT: The 'User'

I just realized that I can use my blog to vent my feelings of frustration towards people in complete anonymity. Oh, the power.

Okay, do you know this person: They seem nice at first. They are all pleasantness and laissez faire wonderfulness. But over time, something about them starts to make you uneasy. You can't put your finger on it. Maybe there's something wrong with YOU. I mean, here is this nice person just going through life and all you can do is grow more and more resentful and suspicious. Maybe you're projecting. Maybe you should talk to someone; your obsessive disorder seems to be morphing into paranoia...

And then it hits you: It's ALL ABOUT THEM. Always. There is no 'relationship' here. There is only THEM, aka 'Centre of Known Universe'. Their wants, their needs, their irritating little ongoing dramas. Warning sign: They never ask 'what's new?' or 'how you doing?' and when they invite you to do things it's never 'haven't seen ya in a while, would love to get together,' it's 'I have a disturbing hole in my social calendar that could be filled by anyone; you'll do.'

Them --> oblivious to everything but the vortex that is themself. You--> considering fleeing to a small desert island with no telephones. Also feeling a little upset for letting yourself be used.

One day, you realize you have become a gynormous listening device for this person. You feel the onset of rigor mortis during endless accounts about endless non-issues that never ever end.

And then the scary part happens: they start to assume ownership of certain aspects of your life. Suddenly you realize, no matter how far you run, they will be there, MEMEMEMEMEEMEing you into an early grave. You momentarily consider coming out to them about your fear, but suspect this kind of depth would be fruitless in the one-dimensional universe of THEM.

And then you remember: your blog. Your wonderful, nonjudgemental blog. Always there, always listening. And so you call it up. And you start to tell it all your problems. Your issues. Your concerns. Your little dramas. It's all about YOU YOU YOU glorious YOU!!!

Question: Are we all unavoidably self-absorbed? What separates the users from the used?


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