My favourite aphrodisiac
When you've been with someone for that long, certain civilities tend to fall to the wayside. Digestive cumulus are openly expelled. Zits are popped in the cold light of day. Teeth are picked, crotches are rearranged. Etcetera.
The thing is, I have this...fetish.
It's kind of wild, but I go crazy for it.
Seriously. I'm a politeisist. That's my totally made-up word for someone who gets turned on by politeness. When a man is polite and pleasant and debonnair in a genuine and non-slimy way (ooooo baby), I don't just think to myself, "aww...what a nice guy." I get a little...well, turned on actually. Not that I'd ever act on it, you understand. I'm married. Also, someone with manners would politely decline a married woman. Mmmm....sexy.
It's a hard fetish to indulge, though. Politeness porn is virtually nonexistent (oh for amateur video of a man opening a door and then tipping his hat to a lady...rowwwrrrrrr....). There are no chat rooms where we can talk "clean" to each other. There is no such publication as "Niceboy" or "Genthouse". Sigh.
Not that my husband isn't polite, of course. In fact, that's a big part of why I fell in love with him. He is a gentleman and he is honest and he wears his heart on his sleeve. And he is quite pleasant and easy to speak with. And he holds the door for me. And...oh my. What was I saying?
There's definitely not enough politeness anymore. --If there ever really was. It's sort of a gentle glue that lovingly binds people to one another. Or maybe it's more like a helpful virus that you catch when some stranger is nice to you and pass on to the next person you meet. I know this is starting to read like a Christian Science billboard, but you know what I mean.
And I'm not talking about basic non-rudeness. I'm talking about manners and genuine courtesy and a willingness to smile at and chat with a complete stranger. There's a fundamental openness and approachability to the politeness I'm talking about, but more importantly, there's a self-confidence to it that is...highly...attractive. It's like you're saying, "I know who I am and what I feel is the right thing to do, and that's what I'm going to live by..." Sigh.
I was at a parking lot pay meter the other night and it kept rejecting my $5 bill. There were these two guys standing behind me, checking me out but everytime I'd turn around to smile and roll my eyes at the stupid machine and crack jokes in pleasant comeraderie, they'd turn away from me and mumble or make a phone call or something. That's when it hit me: basic politeness is such a turn-on and basic...whatever they were doing...is such a turn-off. It's like they put up this wall where they stood on one side, checking me out like a piece of meat, and when I tried to relate to them as another person, they rejected my attempts.